If you have followed Part 1 – Constructive Criticism and Part 2 – Evaluating the Situation, you’ve been at choice and have clearly articulated your own feelings constructively to the person issuing the criticism(s), what do you do now? Before we jump into the heftier of areas of this topic and the hardest type to face, ask yourself if the first 2 parts have applied to the actual situation you’re in. Perhaps this is not the type of criticism and put downs you are currently facing.
Could it be this person is random or peripheral (someone adjacent to you but not in your circle) making comments just to be rude or cruel? Has anyone ever called out to you in the streets with a nasty comment? Someone at your office just doesn’t like you because they just don’t like you. They therefore treat you with indifference and ignore you. This is probably the “easiest” situation to control or be at choice in. Walk away. Ignore. Do not give these words or their indifference power.
Imagine this, a random stranger calls out to you on the street “Hey, ugly one over there… yeah, I am talking to you UGLY.” Will this have an effect, of course it probably will; you’re a human being with feelings. Especially if someone is playing on the details of ourselves with which we don’t like very much or are triggering. No one is immune to hurt feelings. But again, our choice comes into play here. When at choice, you have the ability to remember that this person means nothing and therefore, neither does their opinion! We have the ability to say to ourselves I am beautiful, inside and out, regardless of whether a stranger or person without meaning in my life can see that or not. Even if we don’t believe it at first, we need only to tell ourselves our value, build ourselves up and eventually we will believe it!
Start by counteracting some of the negative people and thoughts that surround you by a) thinking positively about yourself – even when you don’t believe it b) being complimentary or thinking positively about others/strangers around you – tell them, it can help! It is said that if you begin to shift your general thoughts more positively, even regarding other people, it is easier to accept and love oneself. Your mind becomes trained to be more positive on instinct as opposed to negative.
In Part 4, we will face the final act of criticisms and put downs. If Part 1-3 still is not resonating and maybe your situation seems a bit more severe, stay tuned and see if you connect! You just might find what you’re looking for. As always, don’t forget to leave your feedback and to check out the recorded reading on YouTube at www.youtube.com/@feathersjourney.